Thursday, March 01, 2007

I'm Back...Deal With It

I'll be filling in for Bob while he's on his European vacation, so let's try to make the best of this, shall we???


Things looking worse for GMJ in that investigation into performance-enhancing drugs...
___________ Gary Matthews, Jr., who had a career year in 2006 and signed a $50 million deal with the Angels this offseason, has already been linked to a customer list of a raided pharmacy. Do you have more information on him?
Llosa/Wertheim: Yes. According to law enforcement documents we've reviewed, Matthews is not just on a customer list, as was reported Tuesday. In August 2004, he was allegedly sent Genotropin -- a brand of synthetic human growth hormone typically prescribed to children suffering from growth failure -- at an address in Mansfield, Texas. We traced the address and it is the residence of a former minor league teammate of Matthews', who told us that he is friends with Matthews. How did Matthews get a prescription?

Llosa/Wertheim: This, allegedly, goes to the root of what has prompted this massive investigation. According to the document we've reviewed, Matthews received the prescription through a doctor at Health Watch, a now-defunct anti-aging clinic in south Florida. According to the report, the drugs came from Applied Pharmacy services, a compound pharmacy in Mobile, Ala., which was raided last fall by the Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA). This shadowy nexis between anti-aging centers and compound pharmacies is at the heart of this multi-agency investigation.
Evander Holyfield in deep doo-doo also...

A great game in Austin as Texas holds off the Aggies in double-overtime...another reminder to Longhorn fans to enjoy Kevin Durant while you still have him...


Despite the Vanderjagt failure last year, Jerry decides to shell out some money to keep punter Mat McBriar in Dallas for 5-more years...I think this investment will work out a little better than with Chris-Chris.
10-Cowboys that might be affected most by the hiring of Wade Phillips.


On the eve of free agency, several NFL teams released players Wednesday, most notably Brad Johnson and Jamal Lewis...

...BTW, here's several things you always wanted to know about free agency, but were afraid to ask.
A month after taking them to the Super Bowl, but Lovie Smith is finally rewarded by the Bears.

The Mavs entertain Bron-Bron and the Cavs tonight (7:00, TNT). (preview)
Forget that idea that Reggie Miller will be in a Mavs uniform...unfortunately, we will continue to have to watch the abortion that is his broadcasting career.
Dallas does get some help on its off-night, as the Suns lose to trail the Mavs by 4-and-a-half in the West.
Mark Cuban could be looking for sports team number-2...and it's not the Pittsburgh Penguins.

The official Dirk tracker...or somesuch


Some old-time hockey tonight in Florida as the Stars take on the Panthers (6:30, FSNSW). (preview)



Ollie Williams

What I wish I could've gotten Bob to do when he boarded his plane...

Benny Hill was a freakin' genius




Robert Bentley said...

Note to Aggy: check out how Texas fans didn't storm the court after last night's win. The reason is because they checked their calendars before the game and saw that the game was taking place in the regular season. These are the things you do when your college sports program of choice isn't ridiculous.

MrSimic said...

Nicely done, Ty. I still can't stand the wheels-off formatting job you do, but you blogged early and seem to have covered all the major sports stories of the last 24 hours. See how much fun it is to quote lengthy excerpts from other people's articles in order to create the illusion of independent analysis? I'm glad you've learned from your leader.




cracker1743 said...

Note to Tsip: check out how Aggie tips his hat to Longhorn on a game well played, despite the fact he's trying not to throw up from that kick in the nuts. Quit being such a tool, Bentley.

Jake said...

Congrats sips, well played, though at home. Now all you have to do is beat Kansas for a 3 way tie.

Robert Bentley said...

I believe the hat-tipping was going both ways, with all parties recognizing the greatness of Acie. But what do I know; I'm just sitting here in the garage between the socket set and hammer drill. Again, Aggy, it's the REGULAR SEASON; don't take it so hard...

cracker1743 said...

Bentley, somehow I missed the hat-tipping in your very first, very gay comment. The kick in the nuts is that after the great season A&M has had, we just pooped away our chance for sole possession of the Big 12 title. The best A&M can hope for is a three way tie, if Whorn beats Kansas and A&M beats Mizzou. A good showing in the NCAA tournament will of course restore the flow of blood to my testicles.

Robert Bentley said...

The hat-tipping I was referring to was the players shaking hands on the court after the game. Notice the players were not hindered by moron fans going ape over a regular-season win.
I hope you enjoy the good postseason showing the Aggies will no doubt have, and I also hope you enjoy the resulting one-inch erection you will get from the retored blood flow down there. Good day.

DrewJ said...

The topic of rushing the court is quite possibly the most tired out debate of the CBB-themed internet, but please note that following an 18 point beatdown of Texas on Feb. 5, the Aggies did not rush the court.

In fact, the students of Texas A&M have not rushed the court all season. The last time the court was rushed was following LAST YEAR'S huge upset win by the Ags on a last second improbable shot. One of the bigger wins in A&M basketball history due to what the state of our basketball program had been in recent history.

But now that we have somewhat become more comfortable with the fact that our basketball team isn't terrible, you see us less jacked about winning conference games.

But you sure got us got Mr. Longhorn, we'll be sorry that we used to suck and now don't suck anymore and will certainly stop being excited about it.

Brandon said...

Will Longhorn recover from this fact-checked punch to the nuts?

We shall see.

Robert Bentley said...

I've just returned from an extensive fact-checking expedition. Unfortunately, my crack team of researchers could not figure out why Aggy makes so many references to balls and nuts in his posts. Perhaps my next fact-finding panel should have Sigmund Freud as a member...
Yes, I'm referencing LAST YEAR's storming of the court. One year later, I still find it funny. I didn't realize there was a statute of limitations on such things, but if there is, when is Aggy going to stop hanging his hat on that awesome 1939 national championship?

cracker1743 said...

I don't think anyone's been hanging their hat on a 70-year-old title. But you stay classy, Whorn.

And frankly, I wouldn't be punching anyone in the nuts about rushing the court in a regular season game (even the Longhorns) if a) they'd sucked at basketball for most of their existence, 2) had recently gone oh-fer the conference and were coming up from rock bottom, and d) just beat their biggest rival. But that's just me.

Oh, and all the nuts talk is just me being polite. Judging from the bruises on your chin, I thought you liked them.

Bitterwhiteguy said...

I'd like to tip my hat to today's blog, mainly because it has the highest percentage of offsides posts in recent memory.

Cap It said...

Funny, damn funny.

Robert Bentley said...

Where in the Classy Dignified Aggie Handbook does it advocate chucking up threes with less than a minute left when the game is already in the bag just so you can get to a hundred? I'm sorry about your "persecution complex," Aggy, but please don't pretend that you guys are the last remaining bastion of classiness in college sports. I'm also sorry you find my posts gay. Maybe my posts should join the "Corps of Cadets," to learn how to properly repress their homosexuality.

cracker1743 said...

"First?" is gay. That's all I meant. Sheesh, talk about persecution complex...

Otherwise, I think I'll just stick with "balls across the chin", and leave it at that.

Oh, and your mom.

Robert Bentley said...

Thank you all for very enjoyable banter today, although I didn't get many TPS reports done and I'm sure you didn't download as much hot goat-on-sheep action as usual.
I am looking forward to next year, when Acie Law is playing elsewhere and I can actually root for him. He good.

MightyMike said...


Cap It said...

Nice effort today, Ty.

fickle said...

The Mavs beat Lebron & Co., the Rangers sign Michael Young, the Stars play hockey, the Cowboys prepare for a draft, college hoops is getting ready for conference tourneys, and YouTube has unorganized entertainment.

All of this goes on, Bob leaves Ty in charge of the blog, and the ball gets dropped on Sports Friday heading into a Sports Weekend. I'm ashamed.